Here we go again

I've been blessed once again with the cold of the season.  My lovely granddaughter brought us all a cold from school.  Not her fault but that's one gift I could do without.  Same old struggle...the cough that beats all coughs.  I must though, remember to be positive and never forget my blessings in life at times like these.  This is temporary.  Many people don't have that blessing.

Lately, I've been thinking about my younger days.  I don't know if it's because I'm watching my granddaughters learn and grow or if it's because I'm also thinking about may brother.  The one I lost last year.   It hasn't been a year yet.  I still miss him so much!  I miss his silly jokes and the fun that he always seemed to have around his friends and loved ones.  He was so outgoing which is what I am not. 

I recently re-connected with an old classmate.  She was my 1st best friend.  Isn't it interesting how when you have a true friend and you haven't seen or talked to each other in a long time, you can still easily relate to them?  Here I am at 60, remembering what my life was like at age 6. It really it true..best friends are forever.

I have been coughing and not sleeping; hence, I'm on here.
Time to try sleeping again.  Morning comes early.

No words

When you lose someone you love, it takes part of the heart away.  It's like having so much hurting pent up inside that you can't  really share accurately so you don't share it at all.  So..no words can really describe how much it hurts. :(

Seven staples

Today I took my older brother to the ER.  He fell in his drive on the ice and again when he entered the house.  He ended up with 2 cuts on the back of his head.  One cut was about 2 inches and the other about 1 inch.  A total of 7 staples in his head.   I am thankful he is o.k. but- #thefunneverends!

Aftermath

So there is no way to quickly get over a loss of a loved one.

Harley Joe Knox

It has happened.  I have lost my brother.  My heart is broken in what seems like a million pieces.  I loved him so much!

I remember when he was a baby and I would give him his  bottle while Mom was fixing supper.  He would pull my hair and I couldn't get to him with one hand on the bottle and one arm holding him.

Joe was a very talented musician and I am so blessed to have the CD that he performed.  This gives me a chance to again hear his voice whenever I need it.  My children won't have that when I pass because I don't have that talent but they WILL have my words found here.

I always thought when my Mother passed that it had to be the worst experience ever.  Well, this seems even worse and I don't know if it's because I am older and wimpier or if it is because losing a sibling is a little different experience than losing a Mom.  They are both bad ones.  Watching a loved one suffer is the worst thing ever!

Today I wrapped presents while listening to that CD and bawling.  That is the way it goes.  We've all got to heal somehow.  I am sure for every person it is a little different.

I am thankful for the many friends and family who have shown sympathy and support.  Thanks to all!

ROSES

This book was an awesome read!  I just finished it.  I think I had put off reading it because it was over 600 pages but I finally got to it.  It covers a whole range of human emotions and feelings.  It's one of those books that I didn't want to put down.  In my opinion, those are the best books.  I only mention books if they are really good.  This book has a lot of family tragedy, mystery, love, hate and all of the skeletons in the closets.  The difference between this and real life is that for many families, the stories never get told because of the feelings that would get hurt or the embarrassment it would cause.  I think every family has things like what happened in this book transpire.  It surely reminds me of how crazy life can be.  Anyway, if anyone is interested in a good read I would highly recommend this one!

Meanwhile...

Meanwhile, what was happening on the other end of the spectrum?  I'll refer to the spouse who left as "Leaver".  So Leaver gets to run away from the spousal responsibilities and begin a new life with someone else without trying to seek help for the problems. 
  Leaver wants to discard "Left Behind" and the whole family along with any good or bad memories.  Just make them all disappear like inconsequential pieces of trash. 

Is it that easy? Really?  What Leaver isn't realizing is that they are trading one set of life problems for a new set of life problems.  Why?  Because no life is without its problems that's why. 

Three things come to my mind concerning this whole thing at this time:

1. The word "Karma".
2. The phrase "What goes around comes around".
3. Satan is more than happy to waltz through an open door. 

As far as memories go, one cannot dispose of them.  Memories can haunt a person and in this case, it is deserved.  Feelings of suppressed guilt will rear their ugly heads.  BEWARE!

Life is not always fair

I have thought about what happens when one spouse leaves another.  The person who is left behind so to speak has had some of their future decided by someone else.  That can't be a good feeling.  Especially if the left behind spouse is ill.  What chance do they have of uniting with someone new?  Finding someone who is willing to share their life from the get-go when they know they are sick.  I have seen this scenario more times than I care to admit.  My heart hurts for the person left behind.  Life isn't fair in a lot of ways.  Still, there are things to be thankful for...one has to look harder for them when one is depressed because of one's circumstances.  As for the person who leaves the sick spouse...I just can't find any respect for them.  Forgiveness for someone is different than having respect for them in everything.  You can forgive without respecting another person's actions.  God is in control and sometimes it is so hard to understand his purposes.  We must accept the fact that we may never know God's plan for our lives.  His ways are higher than ours and revenge belongs to him.  A life without forgiveness creates bitterness and nobody wants to die that way. 

Today's post seems gloomy, I know, but sometimes we all have gloomy thoughts and reflections. 

Me and Joe

I have mentioned my brother Joe many times in my posts.  He has had such a rough way to go the last few years with his health.  This is us:

We have always been close although we have not always agreed on everything in life of course.  I love my family dearly and my heart breaks for what Joe has been through.  All of it.  I am thankful to have had a good visit with him today.  It did my heart good.  :)

Beautiful Fall

The trees shown in the above picture is the property across the road from my house.  These trees were just beautiful this year!  I took it only a couple of days ago.  The leaves are now gone and we had snow on the ground this morning.  I am not ready for this!  It's too soon!  We needed more fall beauty to behold.  It is all going so fast!!  We had a lot of wind the last couple of days and the leaves that had turned have fallen.  We had many green leaves this year that fell.  It seemed wrong.  But..on to winter I guess.  It is supposed to be cold the next few days. 

Big Post Office

This picture is of the post office in Cable, Ohio.  I have recently thought that I should really take a picture of it because eventually it will either be torn down for a new one or cease to be used for a post office anymore.  There aren't many small ones like this still in operation.  I am not against progress but I've always like the old simple ways I guess. I just think the old buildings are neat.  Wonder how many people have walked in and out of this one?

Monday

Today was grocery shopping.  Not to happy with doing that on a Monday because the shelves were being stocked.  So the store personnel was running around stocking things and they were also putting up things for Christmas.  Looked like some of the upper management from out of town was in supervising it all.  So all of that took longer than expected.  We got home only to find out we forgot 2 items we wanted to get.  So...back to town we went because the one item we needed for today. 

Once we got home and got everything put away, I got chocolate chip cookies baked.  My Granddaughter will love having those for a snack with some milk when she gets off the bus. 

I have the laundry going too so I think I'm doing much better!  :)

Now it's back to work!  I had planned so many projects when I retired.  Got to get started! 

Two steps forward, One step back

Since I retired, I've managed to get some overdue projects started.  Then I got this sinus infection that is going to end up being a month long to get rid of it.  Ugh!!  So, now I'm getting behind on general housework that I was daily keeping up.  😈😬😬😬

So now I'm at that point where I'm feeling a little better but not good enough to tear into everything.  It's a point where I know I need to continue rest to knock this thing but so want to get things done.  I want to do some things outside yet too before it gets to cold.  

   

So tomorrow I am going to start on a fresh list to catch things back up.  Nothing takes the place of persistence, remember that people!  :)

Again!

Off this morning to Urgent Care again!!  The sinus infection was coming back.  Coughed half the night last night.  I got a different antibiotic and something for the inflammation.  Good grief!  Rory and Kendra were here and they were up for a lot of squealing and bouncing around.  LOL  Don't let anyone tell you girls can't be as rowdy as boys..they can. 

My mighty hunter is out trying to get a deer. To early to tell how that might be going.  I do hope he gets one this year. 

I cannot believe we are in November already.  Thanksgiving will be here in a blink of an eye.  We  will be voting on Nov. 6th in the midterms.  This one is a biggie.  Time will tell on that one. 

If you are tuned in, have a great day!!  :)

Things I Don't Get

I guess this could be considered somewhat of a rant but that's O.K.

I don't get purple, orange, blue or green hair.  If that officially makes me old I'm O.K. with that.  I don't get guys wearing their jeans down past their bottoms and including a belt with the whole thing.  I don't get the big ear plugs or booger catcher nose rings, eyebrow rings or tongue rings.  I am not judging the people that have them, I'm just saying I don't get it!  I don't get tats all over some one's nice lookin' face.  I don't get drinking so much that it makes one sick and losing the whole next day of your life because you don't feel good.  I don't get people that wanna wear "vagina hats".  Now THAT brings a person a lot of respect doesn't it?  I don't get a political party claiming to be peaceful and turning around and telling their base to be violent.  I don't get wearing flip flops in the snowy weather.  I don't get the Goth look.  Looking like one crawled out of a crypt.

More rants may come in the future!  Stay tuned!

Gosh that felt good!